Funnies 4 Friday 2

If Men Ruled The World

1- Two words... "Ally McNaked".

2- When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-aleck

answer you responded with would actually reduce your fine.

As in:Cop: "You know how fast you were going?"

You: "All I know is, I was spilling my beer all over the place."

Cop : "Nice one, That's $10.00 off".

3- People would never talk about how fresh they felt.

4- Daisy Duke shorts would never go out of style again.

5- Every man would get four real "Get Out of Jail Free" cards per year.

6- Telephones would cut off after 30 seconds of conversation.

7- The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and eat the losers.

8- It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car, as long as you returned it the following day with a full tank of gas.

9- Instead of a fancy, expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said "You're #1!".

10- When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out.

11- Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed as an acceptable response to "I love you".

12- The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.

13- "Sorry I'm late, but I was wasted last night", would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness.

14- At the end of the workday, a whistle would blow and you would jump out of your window and slide down the tail of a brontosaurus and right into your car.

15- Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards.